Reversed Roles: Shoe on the Other Face

If roles were reversed, it would be interesting to imagine what the fate and scenario if the Iraqi journalist threw his pair of shoes at our own Kibaki. From history, one can reckon that Kibaki's reactions would go something like this:

......"Wale wanarusha viatu wacha warushe tu kwani watarusha viatu vingapi si anapair moja tu. Atatoa pair ingine wapi? Bure tu!!! Kweli huyo ni bure tu!! Kwani sibure yeye ni nini!!!

Crime Pays: Sweet Rewards of Mischief

So the Iraqi journalist who swung both shoes at President Bush is eventually earning handsome rewards for his heroics.In their latest bid to beef up their pitching rotation for the 2009 season, the New York Yankees today signed Iraqi journalist Muntadar al-Zeidi to a three-year deal worth $32 million.

The right-handed al-Zeidi, 28, impressed the Yankees scouts with his performance in Baghdad yesterday when he threw both of his shoes at President George W. Bush.

While neither of the shoes hit their target, both throws "had great velocity and good movement," said Yankee co-owner Hank Steinbrenner. "The first shoe was high and outside but the second one was right down the middle," Mr. Steinbrenner said.

The Yankees' boss said that he was also impressed with Mr. al-Zeidi's fighting spirit when Secret Service agents tackled him. "That could come in handy when we have a series with Boston," he said.

The Glittering Noose Behind Every Wish

Many adages have been coined to warn us mortals of the perils of grandiose wishes. Well, as tempting as they may be all wishes come at a price which can be so steep they would eternally change your life for the worse. Hold your breathe and take a ride with me.

Maina is a modern middle class Kenya with a penchant for hunting. So one weekend Maina ventures into one of the the vast forests of Kenya's Rift Valley to pertake his hunting hobby. Five hours into the forest, Maina realizes he has lost his way in the thickets. Two more hours his loyal dog Simba is dead thanks to the increasingly biting and chilly weather.

Poor Maina is both hungry and thirsty and can now only manage to crawl at snail pace. He is certain in his mind that he has breathed his last breath when all of a sudden he sees an glittering object beckoning from the canopy of tall trees several yards ahead of him.

Instinctively and out of curiousity, Maina crawls to the object, pulls it out of the trees and discovers what looks to be an old brief case. He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie.

The genie is wearing a GoK's KRA ID badge and a dull grey dress. She has a calculator in her pocket-book and has pencil tucked behind one ear.

'Well, sweet Maina,' says the genie... 'You know how I work. You have three wishes.' 'I'm not falling for this,' said the Maina. 'I'm not going to trust an a revenue Officer coming as a genie.'

'What do you have to lose? You've got no way out, and it looks like you're as good as dead anyway!'

Self slavery
The tall and well-built Maina thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right.
'OK, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink.'

Abracadabra, the Maina finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen. And he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

'OK, handsome Maina, what's your second wish.'

'My second wish is that I was rich beyond my wildest dreams.'

Pronto! Maina man finds himself swimming in treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.

'OK, Mr. Right Maina, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!'

After thinking for a few minutes, the Maina says... 'I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.'

Abracadabra, the good hunter Maina turned into a tampon.

Moral of the story:
Watch what you wish for for wishes are often enslaving. There is no free lunch and despite a sumptuous one, the price can be so steep and the damage irreversible. Behind every government service lurks a catch.